What Parents Have To Say
Dear Jaynie & Benchmark Staff,
Everything is fine with Donald! His sharing of an apartment with a friend is a success and Donald is on the right track. He is will go to school in Miami next semester. Thank you for all you have done for Donald, the result is here.
Take care, Marie P., Alumni Parent
Hi Jaynie,
As the one year anniversary of our daughter’s homecoming has just passed, Benchmark came into my thoughts and wanted to update all of you.
She has been doing well, and has been clean from drugs… She has held her job for 8 months and gets there on time every day. She is paying her monthly rent, electric bill, car insurance, food and other living expenses. She is in a relationship with someone that is very responsible and we like very much. Basically, our daughter is happy.
I am sure she would not be where she is today if it wasn’t for everyone at Benchmark and of course, Miss Toii (LaToya Boone, Dean of Student Services.) So, again, thank you for showing her the road to recovery and giving her self esteem back. She could not have done it without you.
Sincerely, Meryl S., Parent of Benchmark Graduate
June 18, 2009
Dear Jayne & staff at Benchmark -
Our son graduated from Benchmark this past year after being there for 2 years. It was a struggle for him- and his addiction will always be a struggle. However, the difference in him is incredible. He learned all the tools at Benchmark and when he wants to use them, they are there.
The staff is really what makes Benchmark work. Jayne has incredible insight and it filters down to all the staff. My advice to parents is to listen to Jayne and the staff when they give you their professional opinion regarding your child. EACH staff member cares about these kids and they put long hours (both physical and mental) into working with the kids.
I would highly recommend this program. My son's personal coach was Greg Burks. He was the perfect match- he understood my son and worked with him in a firm, yet caring way. He knows my son better than I do and was always available for discussion.
Thanks to all the staff at Benchmark.
Sandy (parent of Benchmark graduate)
Below is an excerpt from a Call to Action letter to Congress that a Benchmark parent recently sent to Congress on our behalf:
“I am writing to give you my input on HR5876, the Stop Child Abuse in Residential Programs for Teens Act of 2008, which will negatively impact children and young adults like my son.
My son is currently attending Benchmark Young Adult School, where he finally enrolled himself at the age of 25 after having spent the previous 10 years engaging in self-destructive behaviors. I found Benchmark Young Adult School through NATSAP. There are not many programs like it and it is helping my son. He is working and going to school to become an electrician. He has also been in therapy for over a year. He is learning how to develop positive relationships and we are hopeful that he will have the tools to live independently when he graduates. I truly believe that without a program such as this, my son would be dead or in prison by now.
Two of the factors that are making this Benchmark successful for my son are the close relationship maintained between the staff and the parents and the school's ability to tailor the program to meet each individual's unique needs. The ability to share information freely is crucial. It gives the staff the background and insight they need to create a program that meets his needs. As in all things, one size does not fit all. My son's particular problems could not be addressed by either the education system or the health care system. He fell through the cracks even though we tried for years to get him the help he needed and we had the means to pay for extensive therapy and drug rehabilitation.
It is my understanding that this bill doesn't protect children in state-run programs and should be amended to afford this protection to all children served in residential programs. In addition, it proposes an entirely new federal bureaucracy to enforce the statute. This new bureaucracy will duplicate existing state efforts and will be extremely expensive and inefficient to create and staff in all 50 states.
The Bill also allows new access to federal courts and unlimited attorney’s fees and punitive damage awards. These provisions may make liability insurance for member programs unobtainable or prohibitively expensive.
I understand that you are trying to correct abuses but over-regulating and therefore tying the hands of all programs to prevent the abuses of some doesn't make sense. I have heard that your bill could be introduced to the House of Representative very soon. I am strongly opposed to such legislation.”
Eve N., Parent of a Benchmark Young Adult School student
Dear Jaynie and the Benchmark Staff,
First and foremost, I am thankful each day for every one of you. I wonder what would have happened to our son if you, Second Nature, and our educational consultant hadn’t been there to help us in this process. What you do and how you do it cannot be taken for granted. You are doing something for our son that we, his parents, could not do. No matter how much we love him, we are not trained to help him in the way you are helping him; we do not have the distance necessary to accomplish the goals you set before him; we cannot truly identify with his struggles the way that Benchmark has.
The parent seminar was awesome. Connecting with other parents who have had similar issues with their children definitely helps us know we are not alone. Before the parent seminar, we were in a position that forced us to buy in to Benchmark based on “blind” trust. After the parent seminar, and getting to know you and the program, the trust is no longer blind. I have peace of mind about our decision to send our son to Benchmark. I believe this is the best shot he has at learning and incorporating the tools he needs to lead a healthy and happy life. You answered our hard questions with honesty and grace. I truly appreciate that.
The parent coaching through Next Step for Success was an extremely important and helpful component. Vicki Jones was terrific! And, we were so thankful to be able to meet her in person at the seminar. Vicki helped open my eyes to some blinding glimpses of the obvious, helping me to understand Sam and see given things from his perspective. I have faith that as our son continues to grow and mature at Benchmark, we will be able to communicate with him on a higher and more peer-to-peer plane.
I write this letter as a gigantic THANK YOU and a message of great admiration for doing what you do each and every day. I feel truly blessed that you are in our lives.
With great respect and my full support,
Patty W., Benchmark Parent
Dear Jaynie & staff at Benchmark,
I am sending this note to give my personal thanks to you for your efforts in helping our son become a useful member of society, which he learned to do while he was attending Benchmark Young Adult School. I want to single out people who were with him most of the way during his journey – special thanks to Greg, Flo, Ed and Ronnie!
We all know that when he first arrived at Benchmark, he was not able to take care of himself in any way nor was he able to socialize with anyone. During his time at Benchmark, he has progressed to the point where he is driving a car, he will get his 2 year college degree in a couple of months and he is holding a part-time job!
So, once again, I want to thank everyone from the bottom of my heart.
Mark, parent of Benchmark student
Dear Jaynie,
I want to thank you for the opportunity for us share the amazing Parent Workshop together. I have to say that it will remain one of the most memorable experiences that my son and I ever had together. It wasn't even that we had such a large gap to bridge...it just reinforced our bond!
We both worked hard and I was impressed with his ability to express his needs. He dug deep and was completely honest and it opened a path for us to be able to talk about issues that were unapproachable before. Benchmark is a great fit...he has come a long way. I must confess, it has also helped me a great deal and I am able to look at and work on my part of the relationship. I can no longer only point my finger at him.
Once again, thank you!
Fondly,
S.C., parent of Benchmark student
Dear Jaynie & Benchmark Staff –
Just a quick note to let you know that our son is doing very well!
He lives about 10 minutes from us and been a full-time college student, completing his junior year. He will graduate with a B.A. in History next year. He made the Dean's List, acted in a play (he did a great job), played intramural basketball and has made lots of friends. He will go to Ireland soon with a group from college.
As you know, we are grateful for what Benchmark did for us and our son. He would not be where he is now without you.
All the best to you and your staff!
Sue J., Parent of Benchmark Graduate
Dear Jayne and friends at Benchmark, We’re writing to give you an update on how our son is doing (since graduating from Benchmark.) It was a bumpy start, not surprisingly, after graduation but slowly and surely he got back on his feet. He's settled into a good living situation and most importantly, he's remained completely independent financially! He recently marked his one-year anniversary at his job last week. This is a significant accomplishment for him and he's definitely establishing himself as a valued employee there. Please know that we have the deepest gratitude to you and everyone at Benchmark for what you've done for our son. We consider finding Benchmark to be one of the best things that's ever happened for our family. Thank you so much! We hope you, Don, and your whole family are very well. All my best,
~ Ann (parent of Benchmark graduate)
Dear Jayne and friends at Benchmark, I wanted to send you a note with a quick update on our son. He is very well. He is working at getting his living and financial situations ready for this next academic year and he is on the countdown now and talking about getting his MBA after he graduates! We see each other frequently and we talk every day. Again, we are eternally grateful and we think of you and Benchmark every day as well. Best wishes,
~ Virginia (parent of Benchmark graduate)
"Hi Jaynie,
Thanks for the recent update. Not only is David doing the best he’s ever done at Benchmark, but he is doing the best he has done since he left the third grade. I lived for years waiting for the next crisis. This is the longest stretch of peace that we have had in fifteen years. I can’t relax all the way yet, but I am more hopeful now that maybe he has finally turned that corner. Thank you for everything that Benchmark has done for him and for having faith."
~ Lois S., Benchmark parent
